Top Tools To Help Spark A Career Conversation With Your Teen
Written by Barbara Gronsky, PhD
When considering how to embark on a conversation about careers, it is first important to understand why this is an important thing to bring up with our children. Let us start with a cautionary case study that is a synthesis of many clients that describes where they get stuck.
Career Planning Process Example
Meet the Smith family. Both parents are very successful in their respective careers – Mr. Smith is an attorney and Mrs. Smith a nurse. They have a son and daughter. They did not recognize their role in helping their children envision their future and were hands-off in this area. This approach works for the older sister and not for their younger son.
Defined Concepts of Career
Charlotte loves math and excels in it. Early on, engineering was identified as a good-fit career and she took the requisite courses while participating in robotics and mathletes. She applied and was accepted into top college programs where she majored in biomedical engineering. After completing two college internships in biomedical engineering, she was offered a suitable job during on-campus recruiting prior to graduation. Charlotte has since moved into her own place and is enjoying her new life.
Undefined Concepts of Career
Lucas is interested in a number of different areas, mostly in the humanities. He is an average student and spent most of his high school years focusing on identifying appropriate colleges but not clarifying his career lens. Lucas went to a small liberal arts college without a plan for what to major in. He dabbled in a number of disciplines initially freshmen and sophomore years and ultimately decided to major in history because he enjoyed those classes best. He did not investigate what jobs he could get with a history major or how to obtain them and instead focused on getting through college, rather than planning his post-college life. Lucas worked at summer camps each summer in college and did not complete any internships relevant to his major.
By the time he reached the end of his college career, Lucas felt stuck. Although he liked children, he was clear that he did not want to become a social studies teacher. What else could he do with his major? For now, Lucas spends his time applying randomly to job postings, with no success. He is overwhelmed and discouraged.
There is a Better Way:
Throughout childhood and adolecence, there are many ways in which families can begin to explore what it means to form a career identity. Here are a few key ways in which parents can set their children up for success in that type of introspection.
A critical role for parents of middle school and high school students is to :
Be proactive in initiating a thought process/exploration of careers and the child’s future life.
Be a role model, based on the parents’ work history.
Make the connection that almost all work involves training and preparation, starting right after high school.
Instill a sense of curiosity about the work world and the over 1000 possible career paths.
Consider and be clear with the child about what the investment in a college education means for your family. College is NOT automatically the right path for everyone, particularly if the child is not strong academically or has not found meaning in going to school.
If going to college is the right plan, make the connection between choosing a field of study (major) and future jobs. Some bachelor’s degrees lead right into well-paying jobs; others do not or require an investment in graduate school.
Identify sooner than later a few career paths to explore during high school or early college. This may directly impact decisions about which colleges to apply to or even if college makes sense right now.
Parents will do well not to assume: that the child will figure things out by himself or that high school will guide him to establish career goals. In addition, parents will do well not to assume that finishing college will necessarily lead to good jobs. Not assuming that finishing college will necessarily lead to good jobs.
A Framework for Thinking About Careers:
It’s about your child knowing him/herself – from the perspective of strengths, personality, skills, and interests – and making a connection between that and the work world. Parents know their children well and can offer a good perspective. At the same time, it is important for the child to feel ownership in selecting a future direction and not just say “yes” to appease the parents. Otherwise, many children who have gone along to keep the peace wind up resentful, unhappy with their “choice” and trapped.
Here are your child’s most critical questions regarding career choice
“Who am I?”
“Where do I fit?”
“What is my purpose?”
And more specific questions for all of you to explore:
What are you good at?
What are you interested in?
What career values (things that are important in life) are important to you? (For example, helping society, making lots of money, working in a cutting-edge field) The Knowdell Values Card Sort is an excellent tool to explore this topic. It is also wise to consider a four-year academic plan where electives and clubs are explored to help illuminate what academic interests are emerging.
Getting the ball rolling
Refer to our conversation starter blog post about a developmentally appropriate guide to knowing when it is right to have these conversations.
Talk about your work life
What do you do at your current job each day
How did you decide to pursue the kind of work you chose
Your work history
What you have liked and disliked about each job
How each job you have held has prepared you for the next one
Start noticing all the different jobs that one encounters daily and have your child think about any that could be interesting.
Introduce your child to your friends in different occupations for purposes of informational interviewing.
Questions to draw out your child’s thinking
What do you want to be when you grow up?
What do you like best about your favorite school subject?
What attracted you to the sport/activity/hobby that you spend so much time on? And what keeps you wanting to be involved in it?
What are you passionate about? If your child loves to meet and talk to new people, what do they love about it? Is it hearing their stories, figuring out what makes them tick, learning new things, empathy, or something else?
What types of problems do you want to help solve?
The first step is to understand what they enjoy and then help them brainstorm careers that are connected to those areas.
Activities:
Exploring and developing career awareness through watching movies/videos (Nightcrawler, The Intern, Devil Wears Prada, Hidden Figures, Erin Brockovich, Office Space, Free Guy, Chef, The Nanny Diaries, The Social Network, Up In the Air, The Internship, Legally Blonde, Jerry Macguire, Happy, Living on One Dollar, Jiro Dreams of Sushi, Set it Up, and Working Girl). Later – perhaps over a meal – discuss the different characters and their work/life roles. What kinds of training did they receive to move into these roles and then think about what implications these might have for work and lifestyle choices?
Discuss aspects of the movie that might relate to your own or your child's aspirations. You might spark discussion with the following questions:
Has the movie changed any of your ideas about careers?
Did it cast certain occupations in a positive light and others in a negative light?
Was there any activity in the movie that made you say 'I want to do that!'?
Finally:
It is important to investigate a number of resources together to determine what careers align with a student’s interest. A few of these include: Interest Assessments such as https://www.careeronestop.org/ExploreCareers/Assessments/interests; https://www.mynextmove.org/explore/ip; or the Strong Interest Inventory (administered by a professional) and Knowdell Career Values Card Sort to evaluate career values.
Check out the following links to help explore career advice and potential job shadow opportunities.
Check out www.CareerVillage.org – get real-life career advice from over 130,000 professionals.
Check out www.jobshadow.com - which features interviews from professionals working in a vast number of fields, including some more unique professions that might be of interest to students such as jobs in the arts, roles that involve work with animals, and “jobs you may not have heard of.” Students can also search for interviews based on compensation structure or work environment.
Check out www.mynextmove.org, which is a government-sponsored/user-friendly website describing over 1000 career paths - complete with descriptive video, educational requirements, compensation information and the job outlook over the next 10 years.
And don’t forget that YouTube is a repository of career/job information - although subject to the biases of the video creator.
